What you notice matters and what I’ve noticed is that human beings are not good mergers. In traffic or in life.

To get on the freeway here in Seattle, I have to traverse a one block section where people need to merge both right and left to get in the lane that will take them where they want to go.

Fear of Merging
No matter how often I come to this juncture, I’m always surprised at how awkwardly people navigate this transition and how jammed up it gets. I wonder this: How often do people need to merge before they realize that if they just keep moving, signal their intentions, commit and get over when they are first able to, how smoothly traffic would proceed. I get the energetic impression that people expect merging to be jerky and messy.

I’m convinced that the problem is this: too many people don’t like to merge! I realized that this was a perfect metaphor for human nature. We not only don’t like to merge in traffic, we don’t much like merging on our life path either.

So what’s jamming up the works on the streets and on the road to a successfully traversed life? Here’s a few observational guesses:

1. Not enough people are planning ahead for the merge or transition coming
2. People aren’t seeing the big picture or anticipating their next best move
3. We humans can be wishy-washy about what we’re going to do — first signaling one thing then changing our minds
4. Too many people wait until the last moment to merge, and end up veering in front of others
5. Many people aren’t paying due attention to where they are going, they are not seeing the signs posts that could help direct them
6. Other people panic when they realize they’re in the wrong lane and slam on the brakes!

Merging or transitioning through life could be simple. Yet we humans tend to find all kinds of ways to complicate this natural process. We get stopped and stuck unnecessarily. Do any of the following scenarios sound familiar to you?

• You know you need to make a transition or change your course but you keep putting it off. You stay in the wrong job or an unsatisfactory (or downright bad) relationship even when red lights are flashing and sirens are going off around you. Why get off on an unknown exit? At least this road is familiar, right?
• You keep following a self-defeating or unfulfilling path even if you have come to realize that the decision that got you here was faulty or ill-considered. Your intuition is screaming at you to change direction or get off the road completely! Yet, you think it’s too late to make a change or you freeze, unsure how to react to the situation you now find yourself in.
• You’re trying to steer more than one vehicle. You know where you want to go, but you think it’s all up to you redirect someone else’s life before you can pay attention to your own path.
• You keep hoping that someone else will make the decision to drive!!

Most of us have found ourselves not merging in life when we know we should. We do this because we think it will be too hard to merge and others won’t like us going in a different direction. Inertia sets in. We let fear of the unknown and doubt take the wheel.

Messing with manifestation momentum
What happens then? Instead of being able to merge gracefully and smoothly when a life opening (opportunity) presents itself, you wait. You lose your speed of progress. You head away from the natural flow of Universal momentum. You stop manifesting easily.

Eventually you will have to merge. You either choose to make the little transitions in life and major life changes or get forced off the road you’re on. This causes an abrupt course change and may mean that you nearly stop dead in your tracks. UGH!!

Here are some tried and true tips for learning how to merge in life:

1. Live and direct your life with intentional awareness. What you notice does matter! When you practice living awake and tuned in to what’s happening around you, you see the signs that help direct you. Notice how your actions in life (such as driving) mirror your beliefs and actions related to your goals and dreams.
2. Make a considered move without over-thinking it. Watch for the simple shift, the easy thing to do. Life doesn’t have to be an obstacle course. Be clear and you get support from the Universe to manifest your goals and dreams.
3. Get the big picture. I learned this in high school driving class and I’ve never forgotten it. When you observe clues that help to indicate when a shift in direction is a good idea, you become adept at making good moves rather than having to react to a unfavorable situation.
4. Signal your change intention to others. I know that sometimes it’s tempting to believe that by signaling our intentions to others we give them a chance to get in our way. The truth is that when you commit to a new direction, people will work you. They’ll even help pave the way for you. Trust that others want things to move smoothly for you because it helps things move smoothly for them.
5. When an opening appears, take it! Don’t hesitate, don’t second guess yourself. Go with the flow. So often we miss the perfect opportunity to merge in life. Then it’s so much harder to make the shift with ease because you have to backtrack.
6. Empower yourself by learning to enjoy transitions and exciting life adventures.. Just keep moving in the direction that feels expansive; that feels in alignment with what you instincts and intuition are telling you. Fear likes to put on the brakes when you commit to a change, this is a good opportunity not to listen to the fear-driven ego mind.
7. When you find a new path, map it for others to follow. By being a great example of what can be achieved when you take action, follow a new road, transition with ease, commit to a change despite your fears, you are an inspiration for others to follow. Now, that truly makes you king or queen of the road!!